Baldly Forward

Hello. My name is Jenny Madison.

For many years I’ve wanted to write about my experience as a bald woman. Not only as a catharsis but to hopefully inspire other humans to embrace their otherness more fully. The reasons I’ve delayed writing about living with Alopecia (an autoimmune disease that causes hair loss) are countless, and I’m not sure I even completely grasp the ways in which the disease has affected my life.

I started losing my hair sporadically when I was maybe 21 years old. The hair loss came on strong, but it responded to treatment. Only for a short time, though. From there, I’d spend all my adult life in various stages of baldness. Now at age 50, I’m about 5 years out from losing ALL my hair. Eyelashes and eyebrows included (which had never happened before). Prior to this most recent event, the loss was extreme from time-to-time. When this would happen, I’d shave the rest and wait for the growth, holding out hope for a more bountiful harvest. With my eyelashes and eyebrows still present, I could “pass” for someone who had hair.

Although I’m still trying to get comfortable in my skin, I know this complete loss of hair is a gift. It pushed me into a letting go stage instead of me existing to hold on to every strand—disguising my baldness and my pain with a wig and a smile.

Connection NOT Perfection

I realized recently that I haven’t started documenting and sharing because I’m still going through it. I probably always will be. I’m actively trying to figure out how to navigate the unique experience of being a bald woman in a hair-obsessed culture. Just because I haven’t arrived at this magical consciousness level where each day I strut my bald self out into the world confidently—it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t commune with others around the subject. I want my experience to help make someone else’s struggle feel lighter and more tolerable, no matter what that struggle is. There’s a part of me that hopes to gain the same from inviting you in.

What I know for sure is that NOW is exactly when I should be writing and sharing my experience. In all my vulnerability, I’m going to share the good, the bald, and the ugly associated with being “different.” Some days I may share how I’m trying to improve my false eyelash application skills, and the next day I may discuss something spiritual or mystical. It’s all connected. We’re all connected. I love that we aren’t defined by one characteristic or painful experience. But we can all benefit from sharing what makes us hide or hurt.

I’m inspired today by something I heard on a podcast I love. It’s called “The Gathering Room.”  The host, Martha Beck, recently discussed that we should drop the pressure of perfecting and focus on connecting. I needed that today as I write my first Baldly Forward post. I don’t have to be perfect on my journey to acceptance or be perfect at this blog thing. I just have to show up and connect. The pursuit of happiness in this life isn’t about perfection or arriving at some grand destination. It’s about enjoying the ride and connecting with fellow travelers along the way. 

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In this blog, I’ll share my many experiences as a bald, middle-aged, queer woman—still traveling toward loving myself more. I’ve come a long way with a long way to go. We all have that in common, as everyone has something that keeps them from appreciating their own beauty and existence. I hope as I move Baldly Forward, something I share in this blog will move you.  

Please sign up for regular posts and reach out to introduce yourself. I look forward to sharing with you.